Lore

Just a few years ago, on this very date, in this very camp, a gruesome murder took place. One so heinous that the victim's affluent family vowed to buy out and demolish the entire park, regardless of who stands in their way. Some say that the killer still prowls these woods. Others believe the spot draws new killers in like predators are drawn to the scent of blood. All we know for sure is that it's time for Camp Conover to re-open its gates... and we should probably start by painting over that "Camp Cadaver" graffiti...

The Villains

A very rich, very eccentric family, and the unsavory people they employ.

The Family

The Tycoon

A billionaire industrialist who earned his fortune in oil, tobacco, factory farming, and other controversial things people generally seem to dislike. When the Tycoon's oldest child and heir was the first victim at Camp Cadaver "all those years ago", he swore to tear down the park it resides in and destroy anyone who stood in his way. Even if they weren't really standing in his way. Even if they were a little off to the side.

The Crackpot

The crazy uncle we all have, though no one is quite sure whose uncle he actually is. The Crackpot has forgone a life of luxury to live in a bunker at an undisclosed location. The Tycoon is the only one who knows how to get in touch with him, and the pass code is supposedly "Grassy Knoll". Don't tell anyone.

The Identity Thief

The Identity Thief left drama school to "find herself". She didn't. What she did find, however, was a series of social security numbers and identification cards. The Tycoon wonders how much money she spends on wigs each year. It's more than he thinks.

The Mistress

Nobody tell the Tycoon's wife. Which wife? The current one. His ex-wives are all aware. Most of them were the Mistress at one point.

The Peeping Tom

The creepy cousin with boundary issues. The Peeping Tom spends his nights wandering, and so do his eyes. He has quite a lot of secrets, and it'll cost you if you want him to keep them. The price is usually silence when you know a bit too much about his friends and family.

The Stalker

Too entitled to accept the words "leave me alone, I don't even know who you are", the Stalker is the Tycoon's niece. He ensured she got anything she wanted, and now she seems to have trouble discerning between gifts people freely give you, and human beings who scream when they wake up to find you staring at them.

The Tattle Tale

The Tycoon's youngest daughter, sent off to private school at a young age. The Tattle Tale wants to earn the Tycoon's attention and affection. The easiest way to do this is by ratting out others until he thinks she's the only one he can trust. She has few friends and many enemies. Who cares? She has daddy's approval.

The Hired Help

The Bouncer

Working the door at the infamous "Stub Club", the Bouncer knows how to identify and neutralize dangerous people. Since the Tycoon owns several local businesses, including the club, the Bouncer can be called upon to make sure people with murderous intent stay away from the ultimate VIP, the Tycoon.

The Butler

The Butler worked diligently for the Tycoon's father, and his father's father, and his father's father's father... Wait. How is that even possible? ... In any case, the Butler does what needs to be done and never asks questions. Unless the question is "Sir, should I make them suffer or kill them quickly?"

The Chauffeur

A skilled driver who gets criminals out of tight situations... for a price. Rumor has it that the Chauffeur used to race professionally until he was caught huffing the air out of tires. That doesn't even do anything. Why was he fired for that?

The Lawyer

He's in more hot water than any of his clients. The Lawyer represents the Tycoon in court... when he can't bribe or threaten the case away. Lawsuits? Restraining orders? Murder charges? The Lawyer is here to fight for you. In the end, he'll probably be your cellmate.

The Maid

Stoic and unflappable, the Maid is a skilled fixer capable of making any crime scene sparkle. Unless she's out of Lemon Pledge™. No one gets DNA out from under the fingernails of a murder victim like the Maid. Now available at your local mansion.

The Manager

The Manager works at the most prestigious employment firm in town, and excels at placing the right person in the right position. She sees your strengths and your weaknesses. She thinks your weaknesses are just adorable. Wow, you have so many weaknesses. Aren't you something special?

The Mole

Who says you can't work for the U.S. Government AND a corrupt Tycoon? The U.S. Government says you can't. The Mole doesn't seem to mind. He's adept at bugging conversations and eavesdropping on private conversations. Please speak directly into the house plant.

The Plastic Surgeon

Welcome to the Plastic Surgeon's elite cosmetic alteration spa. Yes, it's in a strip mall. Yes, it used to be "Papa Pepperoni's Pizza Palace". No, they don't have pizza. Do you want the Plastic Surgeon to fix your horrible, ugly mug or not?

The Politician

The Politician is an upstanding citizen, protecting the country's ideals and ensuring a better future for our children. If you'd prefer the opposite, you can make a small donation to his campaign fund. Add a note detailing exactly how you want him to ruin the future for your children.

The Sawbones

The Tycoon needs to take a yearly physical to keep his position at the head of his company. He doesn't like physicals. The Sawbones checks his pulse and deems him "healthy enough". He's also available to remove bullets or sew up stab wounds if the emergency room is too low-brow for you. Keep in mind that if he makes a house call, he's probably going to crash on your couch for several months.